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Inspiring and empowering people to maximize their quality of life in spite of a chronic health condition or a disability |
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STEPS TO CHANGE |
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Issue # 20 |
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This ezine is 100% opt-in. You are receiving it because you subscribed but may cancel by using the link at the end of this message. |
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IN THIS ISSUE |
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A chronic health condition can be a catalyst for personal growth and self-discovery. Are
you ready to break free of the bindings that are holding you back from
discovering your
own personal level of optimal health? We all have one – no matter what the condition is that ails us. We
challenge you to want to discover yours! We take people from an overwhelmed existence to a comfortably paced lifestyle. Are you ready for that journey?
Contact us today for a fr~ee sample coaching session and get started on living your maximum life.
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***** IMPORTANT NOTICE! ***** |
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In an effort to bring you more resources and services we are upgrading our Newsletter email service. By now you have received an email regarding this. In order to keep receiving our newsletter, Steps to Change, you MUST respond to by using the link provided here to send us a blank email. We are excited about many wonderful new things that we will be sharing with you in the coming year and do not want you to miss out. If you have any questions please do not hesitate to contact us at Newsletter@changingpaces.com TRAVELS WITH TRISH Well, it was a really rough Jan/Feb/Mar/Apr for me. I thought I had the world by the tail in December but alas the infamous rollercoaster of life took me for a ride. My mother was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer on January 6th and subsequently passed away on February 2nd. I miss her deeply but life must go on and I'm trying to move forward. In honour of my mother's passing, I'm dedicating this newsletter to treasured mothers everywhere for Mothers' Day. The feature article included in this issue of Steps to Change will discuss the challenges and key strategies for managing loss and chronic illness. I hope it touches your heart and your health. If you have subscribed to our newsletter just recently: Welcome to our readership! We truly appreciate your interest. If you have been on our mailing list for some time, thanks for your loyalty. Either way, please feel free to forward our newsletters to anyone who you think may benefit from them. Till next
time, take care and God bless.
~~ Trish :-) and
The
Changing Paces Team trish@changingpaces.com
~~
905-967-3014 ~~ www.ChangingPaces.com Uncertain what coaching is all about? Check out our "Audio Library" and listen. |
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GROUP COACHING |
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JUMP START TO INDEPENDENCE!Sign up NOW for September 2007 Quick-Start Program for New Home-Based Business Owners (and those aspiring to be one) IT'S
A FOUR-MONTH
GROUP COACHING PROGRAM Do any of the following statements "speak" to you? You're living with a chronic illness... Feeling pushed aside as a result of your health... Yearning to get back to making a living and contributing... Thinking that a home-based business is where it's at for you... Just not sure where to start... Uncertain about how to put the pieces together... If
you have
a great idea for a home-based business and the will to make it happen
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Just because you're living with chronic
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Bonus: If you sign-up by May 31st (midnight), you'll have access to our subscribers-only early-bird rate of $199 for the entire 4-month program! If
you are ready to begin the most exciting adventure that you've experienced
in years, you HAVE to sign-up - EMAIL
US NOW and together, we'll plot a
course to your success! |
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FEATURE ARTICLE |
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MANAGING LOSS AND CHRONIC ILLNESS It was Saturday, January 6th about 6pm when I got the call. My mom asked me if I was sitting down. I said I was and she told me that the doctor had been in to give her the news. She had cancer. Instinctively, I knew that it was the bad kind (as if there's a good kind). I fell apart as soon as I hung up the phone. I cried, I sobbed, I wailed - I knew in my heart this was the beginning of the end. She'd been having pain in her right shoulder for weeks but assumed it was her arthritis. Finally, on December 28th she called an ambulance because she just couldn't stand the pain any more. They admitted her to the hospital and began testing. She lived 5 hours from me in my home town of Windsor, Ontario and I was feeling powerless, to say the least. When the diagnosis finally came in, we jumped in the car and raced to her side. We would later learn that it was stage 4 lung cancer and had already spread to her bones, brain, liver and spleen. When you live with chronic illness as she did, it is easy to chock up new symptoms to known conditions. The reality is that just because we live with one chronic illness it does not make us immune to others. My husband and I spent the month of January commuting those 5 hours on a weekly basis; 4 days in Windsor and 3 days at home. I slept off and on for the entire 3 days a week at home. The emotional and physical stress was more than my body could bear. I knew that I had to take care of myself so that I could do what I could for my mom. Living with clinical depression and multiple sclerosis myself necessitated that I take extraordinary measures to guard my health. In spite of my passion for my work, I chose to call my assistant and have her contact all of my clients and put my entire practice on hold for 5 weeks. A person of average health might have tried to work even part-time through all that but I knew that if I did not focus my energy on my mom and my own health needs, I wouldn't make it through the crisis. Whenever we were in Windsor, we stayed at her apartment. This enabled me to make the most of my energy. I could work on gathering her vital information (insurance, bank accounts, credit cards, etc) while also sorting through all of her belongings to prepare for packing up and moving her out. We knew at this point that she would not be going back home. She would be transferred to palliative care directly from the hospital. I was careful not to grieve too openly with her but held nothing back when I was with Ernest. Staying at her apartment while sorting through and packing up her things was a huge blessing. It enabled me to feel her presence in my grief while I went about the business at hand. I knew that it was important for me to feel the grief and let it go. Bottling up any kind of emotion is detrimental to your health but containing grief can immobilize someone living with chronic illness. I made it a point to reach out to all her friends and family. Through regular emails, I kept them all up to date on her condition and her needs. They responded by visiting her, bringing her things she needed or wanted and making efforts to support me however they could. She was phenomenal! Having lived for years with chronic debilitating depression, it was as though she was on top of the world after her diagnosis. I think it was a light at the end of a very long dark tunnel she had been living in for many years. She was in great humour, warm, pleasant and more positive than she had been in as long as I can remember. She
helped me plan her funeral, the division of her estate and all the big
and little things that she needed me to do before she died. I had the
best 4 weeks with her that I've had in a very, very long time. God
I miss her. Next to my husband Ernest, she was my best friend.
At the end, she was in a restless coma struggling to breathe. She had a death rattle that lasted more than 12 hours. We arrived at the hospital at 1am on Friday the 2nd of February after the fateful phone call on Thursday evening with news that she was going downhill fast. I stayed at her bedside till 5am. At that point, we didn't know if this would go on for days. Ernest coaxed me into resting in the lounge at the end of the hall. Of course I did not want to leave her side but again, I knew that if I did not take care of myself, I would not be any good to anyone - least of all my mom. I
woke up, wide awake at 7:45 that morning; as if Someone had shaken me
awake. It is clear to me now that Someone HAD woken me up. Ernest was still sleeping in another chair across the room.
I went to her and found her alone, the rattle in her lungs gone.
It was now
merely a short painful gasping for air. There was no longer any
room in her lungs for air. She was still in a coma. I
sat by her bedside, took her hand in mine and talked to her gently.
I told her that I loved her, that it was ok to let go, time to go
find her parents; that I would be ok, Ernest would take care of
me. Miraculously,
the Lord brought her to me for a brief fraction of a moment and she
opened one eye, just a 1/4 inch but enough for me to see that she was
looking right at me. One tear welled up in the corner of one eye
and another rolled down her cheek on the other side. ...she'd
heard me. If
ever there was any sliver of doubt in my heart that God exists, it left
me in that instant. He had brought her consciousness out of the
depths of that merciful coma to give me one brief fragment of time to
connect with her before He took her Home. Within
seconds, her chest stopped moving and she exhaled her last excruciatingly
painful breath. I know with every fiber of my being that she is
free of her pain now, she is happier than she has ever been, and that
she is now watching over me doing all she can to sooth my pain over
losing her. I'm
sad to say that after 5 years since I quit smoking, I started again the
week after her diagnosis. I'm up to a pack a day now but I know
with certainly that I will quit again soon. Imagine... she's
diagnosed with lung cancer and I go back to the cigarettes. Very
sad. In
life, had she known, she would have been horrified and demanded that I
stop. In death, I'm sure she's found compassion for my weakness. It's
been rough but she's out of pain now. For that I am very grateful. Never
miss one opportunity to cherish those who are close to you and tell them
what they mean to you, because you never know when that opportunity will
be lost forever. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Strategies for coping with grief and loss:
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FEEDBACK FORUM |
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Awareness training delivered...
"(Our staff gained) …an awareness of how others feel and also the comfort level to know that it is okay to talk about issues if someone is having difficulty. It was also a great message to staff to know that their employer supports the whole area of accessibility, both for staff and for patrons. "The facilitators were very knowledgeable about the information from a government regulation standpoint and also from a personal standpoint. It was very interesting for others to hear first hand the difficulties people face and how they have been able to overcome them. Everyone was given the opportunity to speak about their issues and concerns they have as well as to voice positive experiences they have had. "(The workshop) ...was very to the point and the time lines seemed to work well. Anyone who needed further discussion was encouraged to contact you and that was also a good opportunity for them." Micole Ongman is the Program & Aquatic Supervisor for theTown of Whitchurch-Stouffville |
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CHUCKLES TO LIGHTEN YOUR DAY |
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SUPERMARKET SURROUND SOUND
The new Supermarket near
our house has an automatic water mister to keep the produce fresh. Just
before it goes on, you hear the sound of distant thunder and the smell
of fresh rain.
When you approach the milk cases, you hear cows mooing and witness the scent of fresh hay. When you approach the egg case, you hear hens cluck and cackle and the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of bacon and eggs frying. The veggie department features the smell of fresh buttered corn. I don't buy toilet paper there any more. |
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FR~EE RESOURCES |
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WORDS TO CONSIDER |
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"When life’s problems seem overwhelming, look around and see what other people are coping with. You may consider yourself fortunate." – Ann
Landers, columnist "Adversity is another way to measure the greatness of individuals. I never had a crisis that didn’t make me stronger." – Lou
Holtz, football coach, broadcaster "The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, worry about the future, or anticipate troubles but to live in the present moment wisely and earnestly." –
Buddha, philosopher |
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ABOUT TRISH |
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Trish Robichaud is a Maximum Life Coach who lives with major depression and multiple sclerosis. Her passion is helping people to maximize their quality of life in spite of a chronic health condition or a disability. Through the process of coaching, she takes her clients from an overwhelmed existence to a comfortably-paced lifestyle. Trish co-facilitates TeleClasses and a monthly Health Solutions Connection at no charge to participants as well as publishes a free monthly electronic newsletter. Her services also include motivational speaking and Disability Awareness Coaching for organizations through interactive experiential workshops. Her background is in business with training and extensive experience in support counseling and life skills facilitation. Together with her vast experience advocating for people with disabilities, her success with her own personal journey makes her ideally suited to coaching others through their life, health and vocational transitions. Contact her anytime for a c-0-mplimentary sample coaching session. She can be found on the web at www.ChangingPaces.com. |
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© 2003-2007
Trish Robichaud, All rights reserved |
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